Original story and good premise. My comment about an editor is because there are several phrases that repeat.
For instance, if you were playing a drinking game, and took a shot every time one of the characters “wrapped their arms around their stomach” you’d die of alcohol poisoning shortly. Never mind the logistics of actually wrapping your arms around your stomach. Seriously, give it a try. lol
But for a credit to get the whole series, it’s worth a listen.