The story idea was weak, but okay. The twist felt like an afterthought that had to be pieced into the already finished product.
The characters were unlikable. Most characters have at least one redeeming quality and those are the characters you’re not supposed to like. I just couldn’t care what happened to these people. When the time came for character transformations, they were so unrealistic and unsubstantial, I couldn’t really be made to believe that the changes actually happened, let alone stuck long term.
This story and its characters were such a waste of time that when I woke up after nodding off halfway though, I didn’t feel I missed enough substance during my three hour nap to warrant backtracking.
I was sorely tempted to return this book.
P.S. Dear author,
I’ve hardly ever heard the happy birthday song sung in any way OTHER than accapella so how is THAT supposed to be what’s mournful about it?
Also, if your epilogue is needed to explain and tie together THAT much of your story, you need another rewrite before publishing.