What disappointed you about Daimones?
The unrealistic dialogue. The author seems to dislike using contractions for when people are speaking, even when most people would use them. A character saying “I do not like that” over “I don’t like that” makes them sound wooden in many cases.The characters themselves are somewhat unbelievable too.
Lastly there are typos that make it into the narration. “She moved graciously” for example.
Which scene was your favorite?
The set up at the beginning of the story was very interesting. I enjoyed the idea but couldn’t get past the halfway point.
What character would you cut from Daimones?
Not cut so much as re-write. The main character should make more logical choices or at least take less logical ones for emotional reasons. The female characters should do more than just stand in the background while the male character does everything.
Any additional comments?
There’s better end of the world fiction out there.

I thought the narrator was good and did what he could with the subject.